A resilient spirit is a giving spirit

A resilient spirit is a giving spirit.

We all know that people who give of themselves are those who gain the most. We see it in the elderly person who with arthritic hands knits prayer shawls for those in nursing homes. We see the gains of giving in mothers of young children who willingly pitch in and babysit for their friends. We see it in those who work long hours, yet somehow find the time to cook a meal for a neighbor in need of recovery.

The effects of kindness and giving ripple far beyond the act itself. Sometimes just a kind word makes the type of difference in a recipient’s way that he or she follows suit and spreads the kindness. I remember a “pay it forward” campaign a few years ago where people would commit “random acts of kindness” toward others and in turn, so would the recipient.

I taught a student last year whose face seemed fixed in a smiling position. With the greatest sincerity, she exuded positivity every time I saw her. She had a class in consumer sciences where students learned to sew. After finishing the required project, this student made a baby overall for a teacher who was expecting her first grandchild.

This student truly enjoyed making others happy. She and her grandmother baked, and she brought treats to her teachers – a rarity in a high school setting. Noticing that I wear scarves much of the time, she presented me with a new scarf at the end of the school year. This student gave enough with her kindness toward others and sweet smile, baby clothes, cookies, and end-of-year gifts were just icing.

My maternal grandmother became widowed far too young. Her husband, my grandfather, suffered Parkinson’s from a very young age. At the time of his death at age 49, my grandmother had two young sons at home and a tough road ahead. At one point when grief came in a rough wave, my grandmother, an artist, bought wooden hairbrushes and painted pretty scenes on them. She then took the hairbrushes to the nursing home where my grandfather had lived and handed them out to the residents. This act of giving brought her spirits out of the deep wet well and into the sunshine.

People who knew my son Nicholas knew him as one who took joy in giving. When his aunt was selling jewelry at a festival last summer, Nick arrived to help just as a rainstorm kicked up and threatened to damage vendors’ tents. Without prompting, he got to work and helped her and surrounding vendors to batten the hatches and protect their wares.

When I think of my own bruises and fractures of heart, I know healing depends on my willingness to give to others. I also know in my heart that as I focus my sights more outward than inward, true healing takes place.

No matter what our situation or walk in life, we have all been blessed by others. I know I have, and I know that my recovery process depends on my willingness to give back. Sometimes all I can muster is a forced smile, but I try to give what I can, not only for my own health and healing, but because I feel called to share my own blessings. We are all called to share our talents and blessings, and sharing them truly helps us more than those to whom we give.
When I envision resiliency and the spirit of strength, I look back to the many people who have meandered through my life and touched me in so many ways. Those who inspire me the most are the givers who looked outward to share themselves to others when it might not have been entirely convenient.