Hooray for the high five!

I believe in coincidences...and I believe some things are simply not coincidences. Actually, anymore, I am not even sure how to identify a coincidence.

Today marks four months since the passing of my sweet boy, Nicholas. In those four months, I have felt emotion more deeply than my fingers can describe by plinking out on a key board. Things I used to take lightly or inconsequentially have become very important. Seeing Elise or Roger’s names light up on my ringing phone give my heart warmth before I hear their voices. On the other hand, some things that were once of dire importance take a back seat in importance these days. I used to worry about finances more and whether I need to dust much more frequently. I just feel things differently these days. I also feel the presence of Nick in ways that I cannot easily describe.

When I say Nick is with us, I am not using a cliché. I really feel his presence in our lives.

This sounds strange and weird to many, and quite frankly, six months ago I likely would have described my words as kooky, but I know what I feel and I know my boy. Roger, Elise, Scott and I have spotted hawks at various times since his passing and felt the great birds bring us peace at the most tumultuous times.

One day during the Christmas season, I was working in the kitchen and grief weighed heavy on my heart and body. Aloud, I let out a sigh and audibly asked for assurance Nick felt peaceful and comfortable. I kept working and eventually looked out my kitchen window. At the closest range I have ever seen, I saw a hawk on a tree branch in my direct line of vision...I took a double take as this was a most unusual sight, and he slowly flew off through our little woods and into open sky. An unexplainable sense of peace and security washed over me. Coincidence? We are not given the privilege to know.

Last Sunday, Elise called while I waited in the grocery checkout. She warned me she had a strange story, one that she said may be a little heavy to digest, and gave me the chance to opt out until I got home. "Go ahead, I said. I can handle it."

Elise cautiously proceeded, all the while repeating a disclaimer that she just could not wrap her brain around the story.

Riley, her dog is as smart as a dog can be, but does not prefer the mundane canine treatment of tricks. A year ago, Nick taught Clover the cute trick of "high five,” Elise and Scott tried adding "high five" to Riley's repertoire. Riley resisted and saw no need to slap his paw on demand. They handed out treats and worked on “high five” for a day and dropped the tutorial, as Riley showed no interest. Because of several hundred miles distance, Riley and Clover are almost never together.

Sunday, Scott told Riley to "sit." He responds to this command and sat down, but this time, he raised his paw to slap Scott's hand. Confused, Scott gave the command of "high five." Riley immediately lifted his paw and reached to Scott. Elise called for a high five and Riley responded in kind. No treats. No training. And, Riley followed them around the apartment wanting to give high fives.

So, Elise mused with me on the phone, and still in long Sunday grocery checkout lane, was Riley activating his long-term memory to pull up a trick he had no interest in a full year ago? Could it be her brother's way of communicating to them that he is happy, wonderful, and has her back? I guess that is up to us to take it or leave it. Nick always loved his sister and was certainly dog's best friend; if he could reach out in this manner, it would certainly be his style.

Coincidence or a visit? It does give me pause for thought, and a very warm feeling when I watch the video Elise and Scott sent of Riley’s special trick.